A personal story from someone who identifies as genderqueer, it’s more light-hearted than the poem I had written a few days ago, but hey, we need some light when the time is dark.
The cold, hard truth about the ice bucket challenge
12 Breakup Videos Better Than ‘Get Her Back’ by Robin Thicke
How to Tell If You Are Asexual
What is Asexual? It generally means not being attracted sexually to another person. It doesn’t mean you can’t fall in love or have relationships. It just means that you’re not interested in having sex with the person you’re in love with.
Some binder reviews
So I was browsing YouTube I came across this video [link below]. It’s basically a review of three different types of binders: two tank top kind of binders and one which is velcro. I hope you find it informative 🙂
Feel free to send me any comments, and if you actually do have a binder, which do you like most?
The Queer ‘Community’
When I was still a wee child trying to come to terms with my gender and sexual orientation, what really kept me going was the notion that once I was ‘out’ I could finally be a part of the Queer Community. Which meant that even if the straights and the ‘normal’ people pushed me aside, I would always have these people who were like me backing me up.
So with time I slowly came out to my friends, some were supportive, others just could not wrap their heads around it. They felt that who I was attracted to put a damper on our friendship. On the bright side, from then on I could surround myself with people who knew me and cared about me regardless.
But here’s the catch… I was never welcomed into the Community I had looked up to for so long.
I joined my University’s LGBTQ group, I attended events, only to be pushed aside. They had already made friends with each other, I was the outsider. And as someone with social anxiety, it wasn’t easy for me to even try talking to them.
So I set my heart on the online Community. Maybe the problem was that the like-minded people were at the other ends of the Earth.
Wrong.
There is no such thing as a Queer Community. If there is support then it’s few and far between.
When ‘Same Love’ by Macklemore and Ryan Lewis, ft. Mary Lambert came out, I was overjoyed. A mainstream group was releasing a song, an ANTHEM, for queer people. It’s a song about love being blind, that a ‘certificate on paper isn’t going to solve it all, BUT IT’S A DAMNED GOOD WAY TO START’.
Even better, the 2014 Grammy Awards and this ANTHEM is playing and Queen Latifah is marrying couples, regardless if they’re gay or straight. And I just stared at my screen and thought ‘this is awesome!’
I go online, wondering if others felt the same way.
Apparently not.
I saw queer people complaining, saying that the song is a bad one. Guess why? Because Macklemore is a white rapper…. This particular person wanted Lamar to win the grammy, not Macklemore. Fair enough, everyone is entitled to their opinion, but you still can’t hate on someone for the colour of their skin.
Also, Macklemore & Ryan Lewis, as well as Mary Lambert definitely did not use this song for publicity. Why is it that we want Straight Allies, or Straight people who realise that Gay marriage is just marriage, and legal same-sex marriage is a human right, not a privilege. But then, a chart-topping song is released, you can hear it on the radio, and feel the strength in the words, but you hate it. You hate that it was someone straight who released that song.
So I’ve officially given up on the Queer ‘Community’. Just because someone is LGBTQ doesn’t mean that they’re automatically your friend, or that you’ll feel the same way about issues that should affect you both.
Turn Down for What? Kittens.
Every weekend..
What is ‘Non Binary’ Anyway?
Ok this blog is called ‘Non binary in a binary world’…but what does it even mean?
When I speak about binary, I don’t mean the code kind of binary. I mean the gender binary: the belief that humans are either man or woman, boy or girl. And obviously, each side of the binary coin comes with its own stereotypes: boys will play with cars and will hate the colour pink. They will also be rough and love sports. On the other hand, girls will love dolls and pretending to be ‘mummy’. They must adore the colour pink. They will be proper little ladies and must never get into a physical fight.
Sorry to break it to you, but gender is a spectrum. Imagine it: on one side you have male, on the other female …
BÂ ut there is an array of people in between. In the middle of this spectrum are those people who feel neutral, so between the two genders. You may also feel as though you are not even on the spectrum, so you feel as though you are a completely different gender.
As a non-binary person, it means that I do not feel like I am either male or female. I may be biologically either male or female, but I express my gender differently, and I feel different inside.
In reality this isn’t such a big deal. What it all boils down to is the way I express my gender. Some people like short hair, others like long hair. Some like baggy clothing, and others like tight fitting, revealing clothing. It’s just the way you express yourself.
Unfortunately, we are in the 21st Century and we still see things as binary. Birth certificates are either male or female. Even conducting surveys rarely have the option of a gender which isn’t binary. Which is a shame, because I’ve come across a lot of people who identify as neither male nor female. We shouldn’t be invisible.
Nonbinary in a binary world 